How to make a successful webcomic

without really trying.

NOTE: This guide depends on you having at least a fairly good drawing skill. I can't help you with that, and I'm not so great myself, but if you have this one thing, I can tell you how to succeed otherwise.

So here you are. You want to make a webcomic, eh? You've got your little dude drawn here... Maybe he'll be funny, maybe he'll be a genius, maybe he constantly references pop culture. Limitless potential right here. This guide will allow for quite a bit of open-endedness, so you can go ahead and take some more liberty with this guy. What do you want to be the focus of your webcomic?

All right, so he's at a computer. I guess you want a gaming webcomic, or one about technology in general? That's cool, it's a little overdone, but that won't be a problem if you stay true to this guide. Now your guy just needs some distinguishing details. Gotta make him more colorful and interesting, huh?

There you go. Some color is always nice to have. Now this guy looks to have some individuality to him, looks like he's actually enjoying himself a little more, and like he's more at home in his world. That's all good... But now you'll have to bear with me a bit, as we're going to begin injecting "the technique" into this comic setting.

First item of business: Turn him into a girl. Now, now, don't give me that look! If this is too big a change for you to make, you might not make it all the way through this guide and then you'll be the proud owner of another of the millions of comics nobody reads. Really though, if you don't want to turn the main character into a girl, then at least have one or more girls featured frequently and prominently through the course of the comic.

All right, you're still with me? Good! Now you've gotta give her massive boobs. No arguing. Such is the law of the land.

Now cut down on the clothes. No point in giving this character huge tits if you aren't going to show them off, right? This step is possibly the most critical to your success.

This step might be a bit more controversial, but trust me when I say that the internet populace will be all over it even if they won't admit it. Make her in an anime style. Gotta get the big shiny eyes, crazy strange-colored hair, and while you're at it, just go and up the sexiness a bit. Have those boobs glistening at all times and for no reason.

You may actually be able to ignore this step and still succeed, but the internet is rich with weeaboos who will cling to anything that's from Japan or even looks like it's from Japan. While going along with this, you might want to actually pretend you're Japanese (or just Asian) assuming you aren't already.

It's up to you how far you want to take the Japanese-style theme, whether it's just a few elements of the drawing, hard to notice, or if you want to go full-on including cliché anime faces, sound effects that don't exist in other countries, and making people read the text backwards. You can attract more rabid weeaboos the more Japanese it looks, but at the same time you'll alienate all the people who don't like to associate with the weeaboos.

That's basically it. Now you just need to get this girl, and/or other girls constantly stumbling into inexplicably sexual situations during the course of their everyday lives. Include constant references to female anatomy. You can still work in your orginally planned subject (What was it, gaming?) as long as sexy stuff is happening at the same time.

You don't have to be funny, you don't have to be clever, you don't have to be smart, you don't have to be at all creative, just have a capacity to draw girls with breasts and you will gain the luxury of millions of views on your web site, and people calling you a genius of all sorts.

Oh! I almost forgot one important thing: Never actually show nudity on-screen, but get as damn close to it as you possibly can. You'll get people visiting more and more thinking desperately "ONE day her bra might slip off, and it will be the most glorious thing I've ever seen!"